ENJOY THE HOLIDAY WITH FRIENDS AND RELATIVES

"Over the river and through the woods
To Grandfather's house we go-o-o.
The horse knows the way to carry the sleigh
Through the white and drifted snow...."

Grade school in the 30s. Every child had to learn this poem at Thanksgiving. It was written in 1844 by Lydia Maria Child and lost to today's children who don't know what it is to ride in a sleigh through snow. Main roads get plowed immediately and you turn the radio on the songs like Baby's Got Back or Live Your Life, or Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It). There aren't many sentimental songs about family members a generation removed. Everything seems to be in the here and now and if the songs make it in popularity for a few years they are relegated to the Oldies folder. Relatives are no longer over the meadows and through the woods. They usually are a few states away and travel is difficult. Many families tell me it is a chore to be together, that they have so little in common any more. They no longer enjoy being with other family members but grit their teeth and suffer through the day as a duty. How sad!
Yet, there are still wonderful family Thanksgiving celebrations and I was invited to one today, though the family was not directly mine but welcomed me as one of them. The family has a gift that can make people feel wanted, accepted, and even welcomed. Conversation was spirited with no gossip or criticisms, lots of pleasant teasing, and many subjects touched, even politics without fuss or furor.

After a spectacular meal: two turkeys cooked in Webers, many cooks participating it who wasn't pleasantly satiated. After dessert and coffee it was time for Karaoke. Unfortunately I was the wrong generation to participate properly since, while I can read lyrics, I didn't know the melodies. However, when you are surrounded by relatives and friends of three generations, the ambiance picks you up and tosses you around lightly. A line from the book, Sailing, which had a mother saying to her adult daughter, "Sometimes when your children grow up, they become just people you used to know."

My suggestion, don't try to force togetherness where it is a stress to some; whether related by blood, marriage a degree or two removed, or just warm friendships, give of yourself and enjoy sharing the things for which we are all thankful.