"Sexual fantasies are something we rarely discuss, even among good friends. Our deepest sexual thoughts are often considered too weird, perverse, or just plain wrong to be shared amongst polite company; fantasizing might indicate there is something wrong with our relationships, or worse, ourselves. But research indicates that having sexual fantasies is an absolutely normal, if not necessary, part of being a sexual being. It’s not having them that is aberrant." Recent research in the UK with 18,000 subjects makes this point clear.
If there were no sexual fantasies, there would be no rich erotica history from past eras and cultures, drawn and written before the morality cops came into play. We talk about the mind-body connection working for our medical healing but it seems a taboo subject to freely discuss the way that men and women deal with their physical/sexual needs when there is no partner nearby. Imagery is an important component of human tools. When we are hungry we can imagine a lovely dinner; when we crave sweets we drool over the imagery of desserts and other goodies. When we watch love scenes on TV or in movies we identify with whoever is on the screen fitting our fantasies. Without the human need to fantasize there would be no market for porno, a most lucrative business. Do the men who go to prostitutes fantasize having sex with their wives like that or do they fantasize making love to a prostitute when in bed with a prim wife? The answer may explain a lot about how people have to accept lots of things in life and compensate in whatever fashion is possible to them.
The article by Brie Cadman goes on to write: "But we now know that fantasies are no more pathologic than masturbation. They allow us to think about doing something we would never actually do, or about things we’ve done before and would like to do again. (An ex-flame, for instance.) They allow us to sleep with celebrities. (You and me, Robert Downey Jr., just you and me.) Furthermore, fantasy may help our sex lives by increasing desire and arousal; those who fantasize frequently also tend to have more sex. And cerebral foreplay has certainly helped millions (billions? trillions?) of masturbations end in success."
If Nature had not wanted humans to masturbate, humans would not have bene provided with a do-it-yourself kit. The urge to masturbate starts in infancy though society tries to shame children to make them stop (probably because it is too arousing to the spectator adults). Then when an adult male is asked to masturbate in a fertility clinic to offer a sperm specimen, he is handed with which material to fantasize!
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