WHAT YOU NEED TO BE TO GROW OLD GRACEFULLY

Most people are taken in by anyone claiming the fountain of youth exists in their product...instant non-surgical face lift, lengthen your penis, augment your breasts with implants or lifts, get rid of what you don't want on your body, take fat off with liposuction, and on and on the list goes. However, telling people how to grow old satisfied and happy doesn't sell...no one seems to want to grow old, as inevitable as that is for us all.

Just as the infant has to learn there is a time to give up the breast and replace it with a bottle, then give that up for a glass or cup, seniors need to learn that they, too, have to learn that you never stop growing beyond what might have been comfortable and possible earlier in life. While the child outgrows many needs, observing a child being toilet trained makes it clear that it is very difficult to give up even that part of yourself they will later learn not to want to claim as it gets flushed 'to feed the fishies'.

Just as the boys in Peter Pan refused to grow up, seniors refuse to accept the inevitable growing old. Elders need to understand that no matter what they do to themselves, they will never be or look young again. Witness more recent pictures of Michael Jackson, Joan Rivers, Zsa Zsa Gabor, or many others who may no longer have wrinkles, but they don't look young, either. It is not difficult to understand why men on TV want to wear toupees but off TV they are more difficult to maintain as a real enhancement. Vanity plays a large part in the resistance to growing old gracefully. If your identity was wrapped up in your appearance, sadly for you, it may be a greater demand for accepting change.

To grow old gracefully is simple. Accept what was as in the past and accept the limitations of the present whether they are physical, financial, or mental. The older driver whose vision is impaired but insists on driving is as dangerous as the drunk on the road. Denial does not belong during an assessment of current abilities. Just because you used to be able to do something doesn't mean you can or should do it today. If you need proof of that, play those electronic hand-held games with a child under 12 years of age. Reaction time is important to driving; reacting in an unanticipated situation; and whether your brain can quickly process information. It determines whether you can even follow the TV, since we are fed at a very rapid rate with no pauses, to get as much info to us as is possible, even if people can't read fast enough to follow the running tape feed on the bottom of the screen while listening to the newscaster speaking a totally different subject.

Accept the inevitable. Use whatever senses you have working. Keep modifying your life style to fit your current abilities. Sixty five years ago there was a postcard that read, "Don't be the old maid who waited so long for her ship to come in that her pier collapsed." Grab life where you can but don't try the impossible. Give up regrets, it takes wasted energy, as does plotting revenge. There are positives in most things....look for them.