LIVING WITH HAPPINESS; GRIEVING WITH SADNESS part 1

All humans go through life with two universal fears.  The first is that they will be unloved, thus abandoned and alone; the second that they will be unlovable.  How these fears manifest and responses to those fears are two of the major determinants of happiness for a person.  Those who value human life as only a biological principle believe  that only a beating heart is necessary for happiness, which gives one the opportunity to grow up as an emotionally healthy human being.  The stress induced by being unloved or perceiving that one is unlovable accounts for physical and mental illnesses for those who are vulnerable genetically or biologically.

This site describes cortisol,  'the stress hormone'.  One can suffer by having too much of it for too long..  Unfortunately, too much of that which is written tells us the ills and evils we may suffer but it does not tell us what, as humans, we need to do to avoid them nor how Nature may have placed us in a place (with people and chance) which disallows our avoidance of pain.

Unwanted children, born to poverty, stand a greater chance of never having a stress-free life than children surrounded by love and an opportunity to develop the human skills of making meaningful relationships, winning personalities, adequate coping skills, and all the attributes of intelligence, education, and other opportunities for a successful life in our society.

Is there, therefore, any reason that we are unable to see the cruelty that our present attitudes of forcing women, who are impregnated accidentally or by rape, to bear that fetus to a totally unpredictable and less than optimal existence?  The sadness in not for the parent alone but for the unwanted child who lives without love, with no foundation for self-confidence or fortune to be taught the skills to lead a normal , happy life with ability to make healthy, loving relationships.  

The above is a rewritten and modified  Part 1 of a series.  Part 2 will follow soon.....

RESEARCH SHOWS OPTIMISTIC WOMEN LIVE LONGER

"The latest study by US investigators mirrors the findings of earlier work by a Dutch team showing optimism reduces heart risk in men.

The research on nearly 100,000 women, published in the journal Circulation, found pessimists had higher blood pressure and cholesterol.

Even taking these risk factors into account, attitude alone altered risks.?

"Lest we get too good at keeping our stress levels down and cortisol at minimum, someone writes: "Hans Selye, a foremost stress physiologist of the 20th century defined stress as “….the nonspecific response of the body to any demand made upon it (1).” Richard Lazarus, another highly regarded psychologist adds that stress is “…any event in which environmental demands, internal demands, or both tax or exceed the adaptive resources of an individual, social system, or tissue system.”
In many different societies, stress is a common term that is often associated with negative situations and settings. Yet, a stress-free life may also be harmful, because an individual will lose his/her ability to react to the different challenges of life. Every person has an optimal positive stress level referred to as eustress, while stress that is harmful is noted to be distress."