MERRY CHRISTMAS: A DAY TO REJOICE FOR LOTS OF REASONS

A HealthCare bill passed the senate. It is a far cry from its ultimate form, no doubt, but it's a start. Hopefully some veto power might calm down the sneaky little things people put in at the last minute (or, if we are lucky, left out), selfishly for their own needs. However, there are many other reasons to rejoice today.

It's Christmas! That means the worst of the season is over. Solstice has come and gone. We are now moving towards longer days. People will stand in line to return all the gifts they, or someone, didn't want in the first place. What a silly tradition...give something even if you haven't the foggiest what they might need or want even if you haven't seen them for a long time and know little of their current lives. Some will return gifts just to find what you spent on them as though that satisfies their sense of worth to you. Others will keep the gift and pass it onto some other poor soul next year. Some will return the gift and take the cash which is what they really needed in the first place.

I've already stopped exchanging gifts with people I haven't seen for over a year...even family. Fortunately none of them are in need or I would send money, if asked and needed. Shopping has never been a passion and we now can rejoice in online shopping and gift cards. Ah, life is so much easier that way. I remember having to wrap 150 Leechee nuts separately, for my boss to give to his wife who shakes packages, the family custom being to guess the contents. Thank 'Whomever' that those days are over!!!

Regardless of our religious beliefs, we are all stuck with the merchandising that is now starting earlier and earlier. July seems not too early for stores to expect you to begin thinking AND SPENDING. Children don't know what it is all about other than it is a time that gifts are to be received and you can ask a fat old man in a red suit for what you want. Does any of this have to do with Christ? In fact, what has Hanukkah have to do with religion? Not anything, so I am told.

However, we rejoice because we are still believed to be the richest country in the world and have food, clothing, shelter, toilets that flush, lights that go on with a click, and heat in our insulated houses...unless we are the unlucky ones who are poor and homeless, starving in a land invisible to most politicians...at least the ones who most obstruct fixing it.

Dare we hope 2010 will be a world improvement?

GIFT CARDS

JQ Lounge had a blog on gift cards. Apparently a newscaster was fairly negative about them. I took issue with his assessment. I would far prefer being given a gift card than something I wouldn't have bought even had I the money. Too often in my life I have been asked what I would like. I remember wanting a blender, years ago, that I could take the bottom off, wash the blades easily, and even use a Ball jar as a container. I was given a blender that had none of the features I wanted and I was too poor to exchange it and buy what I wanted. I lived with that for many years and hated it all the while I had it until I could finally afford the one I wanted.

When I was a child it was so wonderful to get any gifts and stores had few choices within a category, unlike today where the choices are mind boggling. A whole toy department would have fit into any tiny store of today. There were not the commercials and ads that make even children so clear on the computer game they want out of the hundreds available. That is why I believe that a gift card IS a thoughtful gift, provided it is from a store the person can get to and would want to shop in. For people who like to eat out and can't afford some places, a gift card to a restaurant is good. For theater and concert goers, tickets they might not have felt they could afford is yet another pleasant gift. You probably wouldn't give your grandmother tickets to a concert of YOUR favorite rock star but you try to know her tastes well enough to figure out what she might like.

As my grandchildren grew up, before gift cards were as popular and available as they are today, I gave them money envelopes with cash inside. It was evident that they preferred to have cash to spend money on what they wanted rather than have someone try to guess what they might (or should) like. Shopping for gifts is what I do when I am sure I know what someone wants, can't buy for themselves, or hadn't allowed themselves to buy. Sometimes it is nice to receive something you didn't know existed and that someone thought of you and knew you would find the tool, or whatever, useful. Gift giving requires time, thoughtfulness, effort, and knowing what people need, want or can use. In today's world, many of us no longer have the energy and resources to do that for family members who are distant and whom they may see rarely, often not within the last year. Some don't need money but can use things not readily available in their area. Today, with online shopping, even that is no longer a problem. Almost anything can be found and ordered from all over the world.

Actually, my vote would be to do away with all Christmas presents (or Channukah) and just buy whatever throughout the year you see or find that someone you like might want and that is affordable for you.

CHRISTMAS IS UPON US

Years ago, a friend introduced me to the concept of a 'Christmas Wish List' on a Bulletin Board in her home. This seemed a great idea until I tried it. If it was a child's list, that was great because you usually coordinated with the parents. Otherwise, you didn't know who else might have bought the same item. Adults never wrote anything on it. Before my grandchildren all grew up, I had a list made out with a name and space for each child, so they could write what they wanted when they were here, usually at Thanksgiving time. It became an aggravation because they wrote ridiculous requests that took up their whole space, filled the spaces of other children, and the list was made totally useless for the intended purpose. Now they are grown and scattered throughout two continents. I no longer see them all at Thanksgiving, or Christmas.

It is a challenge to figure out how to change a tradition that no longer works. There are several challenges here. In my 'golden' years I need very little and find myself trying to unload more than I accumulate. I long ago realized that no one wants my left-over stuff, kitchen utensils, appliances that still work but no longer perform the latest functions, out of style clothing, books that are dated, and sheet music from the last 70 years. If I can't think of what I might want, how can I expect anyone else to guess? If I give a suggestion such as a plant, I end up with a jungle; if I say something funny, I end up with a library of hilarious stuff I have little time to read. Writing checks, while perhaps useful to the giver, hardly seems festive. I have given gift certificates and gotten gift certificates, sometimes to places I might not have chosen but to which I was happily introduced. When I ask anyone else what they want, I most often get, "I don't know."

There is no respite as the time grows shorter to the now dreaded Holiday. I detest wrapping and mailing things, though I used to love to make pretty displays of wrapped presents under the tree. Wrapping and mailing gets to be a greater cost than the gift therein. I feel it takes precious time out of whatever life is left. The stores are mobbed and the whole shopping exercise is torture. Shopping online has become a far better experience, though one has the sense of Russian Roulette as reports of card information being compromised reaches the media.

In short, I'd like a suggestion as to how the pleasure of giving and receiving at Christmas could be brought back other than in my dreams and childhood reminiscences. I say boycott the merchants and only buy what you see that you want to give throughout the year to whomever it might give pleasure. If it 'tis the season to be jolly, where did I go wrong?