AVATAR: THE MOVIE

Too the point of boring anyone who will listen, I talk about making my stress free life/ Reading and watching tension free books and movies, keeping my bills paid up, doing only the things I want to do and making those that I have to do as pleasant and easy as possible is a basic plan. AVATAR has to be described as an exciting, challenging of nerves, anxiety producing, violent, thought provoking, beautiful, frightening movie. Seen in 3-D it captures all senses.

Those who know me will also be surprised to hear me say that I would recommend it heartily for some of the best three hours I have ever spent in a movie theater. The concept of a world that functions in a network, includes past and present, trust, loyalty, peace and shows an existence which is, perhaps, what this world longs for. However, in our times, we still have people who believe in taking what they want, rationalizing that anyone who is not human in our mankind's image is an alien and not worth consideration. Preemptive striking and killing is rationalized as the Bush administration rationalized going into Iraq, with matching disruption to our world as well as that devastation to the people who were attacked. Not believing that other beings could have a way of life that works for them is key. Those in our world who laugh at those whom they call the 'tree huggers' will likely see and totally miss the main message of this movie.

If anyone reading this is old enough to remember Fern Gully it is a bit like that, but without the humor and simplicity of the pathos in that portrayal of a similar, devastating and careless human action. If possible, see it in 3-D although it would not lose any of its power in flat screen, is my guess. Read more on IMDB.

LIFE IS A SERIES OF CHOICES

There are good and bad choices, made constantly; right and wrong ones; helpful and destructive ones, as well. We must make choices on whatever data we have at the time. That data is often not enough to make an educated choice, in which case, we must guess. Our life and the consequence of that choice to others, is as predictable as the flip of a coin or a roll of the dice.

Choices have Categorical (influenced by issues of morality in certain duties and rights) and Consequentialist (morality is in the consequences of an act)...in other words, most acts do not affect a single person but that effect covers many with its reverberations.

What, then, happens when we refuse to make a choice. Sometimes an issue just fades away, but don't count on it as few things aren't followed up. Forgetting to drink responsibly, then driving drunk so that someone is killed by you in an 'accident' and the consequences are far reaching, changing the future of many lives. If that person (as is most likely) has family, children, parents, dependents and responsibilities to many, the resulting destruction of that act is felt by all those whose lives are altered, remaining lifetimes for many of those people. Few effects from bad choices have only a short-term consequence.

War makes many orphans. What happens to them in their growing up may turn a generation of youth, as in Iraq, into haters seeking vengeance and having no trust for adults or certain groups...especially Americans, the enemy during and after the war. When people leave their choices to trust God, they've totally thrown their control away and left all those connected to them swinging in the wind.

What most people miss is that laws pose an involuntary choice of action. Many people who naturally fight that imposition, missing the whole point of the law, are looking for independence. That is not how maturity and independence are gained. The generation of the 60s and 70s, adolescents who sat in their basements tuned out on marijuana never did the developmental work needed for a normal adolescent. Now these people may have important positions, families, and we wonder why such poor life choices are being made in such a public way.

Healthy coping mechanisms should be taught in grade school and through college. The way to think through choices should be a part of that. Morality considerations should be a foundation. I do not mean morality as the Bible writes it but, rather as our current life style and set of laws dictates morality which is not limit to sexual morality. Instead, I mean morality as our Declaration of Independence and our Constitution define it.

MORE MECHANISMS FOR PEOPLE TO FEEL IN CONTROL

Today I listened to a talk by someone who has replicated a 100 year old bit of research. It confirmed that most people's brains keep superstitions alive. It was mentioned that, because Obama did well on his campaign on the day he played basketball, he will play basketball on every election day. We all know about those of us who touch/knock-on wood to prevent something bad happening after what might seem a brag.Intellectually, people will say they do not believe in these things, but they do them anyway. One asks the question, "Why?"

There is a wonderful site that lists beliefs, old wives tales, bizarre beliefs, omens, etc. Dialogue goes like this, "I don't believe this but, just in case there is something to this, I won't step on a crack in the sidewalk."

Believers in higher powers give the control to that higher power...whether it is God, Allah, or whatever being. Giving the final decision-making to another alleviates the possibility of your own decision being wrong. The responsibility for control, thus, is no longer yours. "It's God's will." as people give responsibility away. Equally effective is, "The Devil made me do it." Research has disproved all superstitions and high powers but people will believe what they wish to believe and that which works for them.

Let's face it, being responsible for one's actions seems to be too much for too many people. There must be a disclaimer here: All people who believe in God do not necessarily give up their responsibilities. Some believe that God believes them to be responsible for their own behaviors.

FINDING SOMEONE TO BLAME STILL RULES

Whenever people feel out of control, they try to bring their lives back into their control. One way they think they have of doing it is to find someone to blame for whatever put their feelings into a place of no control. The recent attempt of a suicide bomber on a plane is such an example. The problem that people want solved is for Homeland Security finding the needle before it gets into the haystack.

Janet Napolitano made the media rounds on Sunday to let people know that there is nothing to indicate that the problem was part of a larger plot. Even though the bomber's own father had called authorities over his concern a year ago, it is like trying to get a patient committed because you think he did something crazy but you can't prove it. Or, it is like trying to get a retraining order before the fact. Our laws have allowed many spouses to be killed before the court had reason to put a restraining order on...making the after-the-fact a moot point.

It is much evidence of the lack of faith we have in our government appointees and elected officials. When the adults are afraid, what can our children feel?



Since we can't do it all ourselves, we need to find trust in something less elusive than religion, which rationalizes everything good as the hand of God and everything bad as the just deserts of evil and sinful mankind. Some children are fortunate enough to have parents in whom they can trust to protect them. However, that is not true for all, in fact, it is not there for fewer and fewer children these days. Instead of the media rustling up more fear and agitating an already painful emotional life for most of us these days in terms of predicting our future, they could do a bit more by having some people on that can truly promote future comfort by spelling out just what is being done to get there instead of the fear mongers or the opinion givers who read the news and propaganda on air.

THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG DISNEY MOVIE

Today I was taken to see the new Disney movie, The Princess and the Frog. I was eager to see it because I had heard that little black girls at last had a heroine as a princess with whom they could relate. Now, I tend to see a movie at face value. I do not analyze its intestines for allegory and failed to see it in the C S Lewis stories as in The Chronicles of Narnia. To me it was a story and the story made logical sense as a fantasy but I missed that it is a Christian allegory. Despite the fear that it will corrupt little minds, it did not turn me towards Christ, or lions. A made-up story is just a made-up story to me.

"Disney's "The Princess and the Frog" Actually Contains a Powerful Message About Post-Katrina New Orleans" says the article posted by Melissa Harris-Lacewell, TheNation.com at 5:15 AM on December 23, 2009. For more detail on that click here.

The story is set in New Orleans, long before the recent hurricane and flooding. Nevertheless, reviewers are 'stitching' the time frame. As with most Desney stories, the disaster happens and is resolved to a happy ending by the end of the movie. All the strength of character resides in the little 'princess' who does not come from royalty but seems to act as royalty should. The ending is a surprise, neatly contrived finish that ties it up properly. All virtuous elements are in this cartoon movie...great values, hard work,warm and fuzzy heroine, but the handsome hero (the prince)is made to look weak while his life as a prince who did little for himself becoems the most frequently demonstrated trait of his.

The movie is fast, may be a bit scary to some little children though it shouldn't be with someone who can talk the kid through. Unless you hate Disney (actually this is a Pixar), I highly recommend it as a pleasant story on a child's level that adults can also enjoy.

CHRISTMAS HAS COME AND GONE...PHEW!

While random Google hits land on this blog at several day, more than any one subject, the hit is usually about Nikos Kazantzakis who has, written on his tombstone: I want nothing, I fear no one, I am free. I am particularly struck today, the day after the most material Holiday, that those words are wasted on so many people.

The day was to me, not the material things that were given back and forth by loving people for one another; often an expression of knowing what would please that loved one, but that was second to the joy of eating together and sharing ourselves. Sadly, in some families, members don't speak to one another or they bring up the worst of the past which can't be changed. Some argue for their points of view to be followed by everyone, and generally make the social occasion unpleasant Our dinner had all of the positives and none of the negatives as well as being a wonderful feast. We clearly experienced the 'spirit of Christmas' to its fullest, regardless of the varying and diverse religious beliefs of those present. To some, the day represents the birth of Christ; to others it is a day free from having to go to work. It can be spent making others happy by showing how much they mean to one another, and further demonstrate those feelings by their interactions and words.

Email and telephone were the major modes of communication for the day to me. to and from. Loved ones are continents (or often) many miles away, but a phone call has them touching us. The inner warmth engendered by being remembered by those far away, even fairly nearby, is unequaled to receiving the Christmas card that has printed Seasons Greetings and just a signature with no message. While that is a statement of being thought of, it costs a lot of money for the card and the stamps but has only the simple message that I was thought of.

The exception to that is when people send pictures of their children or something else very significant from their lives though, it too, can be done by email. Isn't the whole object to reach out and touch people in any way that is meaningful?

MERRY CHRISTMAS: A DAY TO REJOICE FOR LOTS OF REASONS

A HealthCare bill passed the senate. It is a far cry from its ultimate form, no doubt, but it's a start. Hopefully some veto power might calm down the sneaky little things people put in at the last minute (or, if we are lucky, left out), selfishly for their own needs. However, there are many other reasons to rejoice today.

It's Christmas! That means the worst of the season is over. Solstice has come and gone. We are now moving towards longer days. People will stand in line to return all the gifts they, or someone, didn't want in the first place. What a silly tradition...give something even if you haven't the foggiest what they might need or want even if you haven't seen them for a long time and know little of their current lives. Some will return gifts just to find what you spent on them as though that satisfies their sense of worth to you. Others will keep the gift and pass it onto some other poor soul next year. Some will return the gift and take the cash which is what they really needed in the first place.

I've already stopped exchanging gifts with people I haven't seen for over a year...even family. Fortunately none of them are in need or I would send money, if asked and needed. Shopping has never been a passion and we now can rejoice in online shopping and gift cards. Ah, life is so much easier that way. I remember having to wrap 150 Leechee nuts separately, for my boss to give to his wife who shakes packages, the family custom being to guess the contents. Thank 'Whomever' that those days are over!!!

Regardless of our religious beliefs, we are all stuck with the merchandising that is now starting earlier and earlier. July seems not too early for stores to expect you to begin thinking AND SPENDING. Children don't know what it is all about other than it is a time that gifts are to be received and you can ask a fat old man in a red suit for what you want. Does any of this have to do with Christ? In fact, what has Hanukkah have to do with religion? Not anything, so I am told.

However, we rejoice because we are still believed to be the richest country in the world and have food, clothing, shelter, toilets that flush, lights that go on with a click, and heat in our insulated houses...unless we are the unlucky ones who are poor and homeless, starving in a land invisible to most politicians...at least the ones who most obstruct fixing it.

Dare we hope 2010 will be a world improvement?

WHERE THERE IS A WILL, EVENTUALLY THERE IS A WAY

Today I listened to a radio program on which a man involved as a Locksport competitor spoke. It is fascinating to hear both sides of the argument about whether this sport should be banned. Actually both sides were presented by law enforcement and security people. The beat cops think it is a terrible thing because it can be abused (forgetting that the instructions for picking locks are already on the Internet through YouTube). The Security people like the idea because they can test their equipment before installing it. It is said that lock picking is as old as locks and I like to think of the locks on chastity belts as having enhanced the art and developed some tools for it. Certainly the motivation was there. For more on this sport, click here and here.

Hackers in Israel are having a lot of fun challenging copyright programs to stop them. The latest is that one (known as Labba) claims to have found a way to be able to take anything off Kindle and place it on other media as a pdf file. It is the latest in a series of Digital Rights Management hacks, the most famous being the reverse engineering of iTunes. These stories of hacking remind me of Willie Sutton. Most of you probably aren't old enough to remember him. Click here. Read more....

REGARDLESS OF THE CONSTITUTION, YOU MUST DO IT 'THEIR' WAY

What is the new nonsense about punishing females in the service if they become pregnant? Just how out of tune have out military leaders become. Isn't that pretty hypocritical? Should service people fight all their procreative, sexual urges, need for an endorphin release, but, failing birth control methods working, not have the same protection of abortion...an American right for which they are fighting but that is not available to them?

It was always my impression that you are bound to those aspects of the agreement or contract which you signed (informed consent) when you joined the service. Can the Armed Forces just change the rules in midstream, at whim?

Kathryn Joyce write in Religion Dispatches. Posted December 21, 2009: "Thanks to anti-abortion forces in Congress and other culture warriors, female soldiers are not protected by the Constitution they defend." Apparently there is a ruling that there should be no sex in a war zone. However, that seems not to have stopped rape. The double standard rolls without even slowing down and women have to fight to keep from being seen as weak.

For the complete Joyce article, click here.

LIAR'S NOSES DON'T GROW LONGER

For months now I have been amused when politician's appear on video saying they never said something or other when more video of them is then shown in which they are saying that which they said they did not say in their own words and clearly documented speeches. Yet, nothing seems to happen about their being outed for their lies. What has happened to our people. Have we all been lied to so much that we helplessly vote the liars back into office if we like the lies they tell? It certainly seems so.

Someone sent me a list of stocks of health insurance companies and how they have risen recently. Here's a quick breakdown of major health insurance company stock performance from Oct. 27 to Friday's market close:
Coventry Health Care, Inc. is up 31.6 percent;
CIGNA Corp. is up 29.1 percent;
Aetna Inc. is up 27.1 percent;
WellPoint, Inc. is up 26.6 percent;
UnitedHealth Group Inc. is up 20.5 percent;
And Humana Inc. is up 13.6 percent.

Perhaps I should instantly be ashamed that I assume they intend to continue functioning in the monopolistic fashion in which they have been bleeding the American taxpayers of lots of money for limited service. Is it possible that anyone who voted out the public option can be voted back into office? Unfortunately, voters really seem to be that gullible and probably will believe just as they believe the birthers and others with ridiculous notions that persist in the face of reality.

GREATER BOSTON IS ASSURED OF A 2009 WHITE CHRISTMAS

A few months ago I quoted the Jewish saying, 'You can't control the wind but you can set your sails." Well today it became apparent once again that we can't control the weather, either. Click here. Fortunately, lucky for us, we were on the tail end of this receiving line and fared the better for it. The snow was light, dry, and fairly easily cleaned out of the way.

Not so for those who were south of us, however. From New Jersey on south through Washington, those not used to snow to any appreciable depth never know what to do with it and, least of all, drive in it. I recall being in Quebec City a few years ago and seeing snow piled more than a story high on either side of the road. It brings home that people can learn to do deal with almost anything when they are forced to live with it year after year. Necessity forces people to adapt and survive. Those who can't, move to Florida and live with alligators and bugs for the joy of being exposed to the sun and risk cancer or lathering themselves all day with sun block. Otherwise they are doomed to stay indoors all day with the AC turned on full blast.

It is hard for me to imagine how one can really miss snow though a Georgia friend of mine writes how he wishes they would get some cooler weather and snow. I guess it proves the grass is always greener in the other person's yard. However, a wise patient of mine once asked, "Yes, but are you willing to do what it takes to keep it green?" That was a very profound question because we so rarely think that far.

DESTINED TO BE PUZZLED

Our local TV News channels must be part of a monopoly or somehow get together to prevent the rest of us from hearing something other than inane chatter from anchors. It can't be the only thing in the world, even locally is the snowstorm , though that is what the producers would have us believe because nothing else is being broadcast. Hey guys, we are in New England in the middle of December...what else is it going to do? So many people were praying for a White Christmas I want to call some of them up and tell them to shovel me out since they prayed for the storm.

Those of us with cable can get news elsewhere. The network political shows on Sunday mornings that have been pre-empted so that we can hear whether the anchors had difficulty getting to their job and whether they got their doughnuts this morning. I for one do not like the being -in-their-living-room.

We lost electricity for a bit more than an hour. I found my battery operated radio and listened to all the AM and FM frequencies. Not one had a word about the weather. So much for anticipation of the need for weather emergencies to be reported...what else is a radio good for these days if you can't hear about the unusual that you can't get when the power is not available? Am I the only one who feels this way? Gr-r-r!

IGNORANCE AND 'BLACK MAGIC'

A Brazilian toddler has been found with 42 sewing needles inserted into his body, two in the left ventricle of his heart, now being airlifted for surgery. The article may be read in its entirety here.

Using a legal concept, that of intent to deceive and harm, clearly the case of the little boy is an example of both. However, when we are talking of marketing mislabeling, is not the concept the same. To mislabel food products so that parents think they are giving their children healthy meals, in fact, the meals are potentially harmful, is akin to the tobacco industry claiming for so long that there was no danger in smoking filtered cigarettes. A survey in the UK found that 9 out of 10 mothers could not properly understand the food/nutrition labels on purchases made for their children. For the complete article on the poll done by the British Heart Foundation, click here.

Whatever has permitted our society regulators to have become so immoral, able to 'get away' with it for so long and with so much damage to humans. Our lobbyists will seemingly do and say anything to fool the public as will bankers, politicians, merchants, pharmaceutical companies, and so many other groups which even include religious leaders, police named to protect but who fail to do so when they become the predators themselves. Has it not become a very dangerous society and does one not find it self-incumbent to become one's own expert in safety, security, medicine, consumer-savvy, and are we not forced to live our lives in paranoid defensiveness?

'TIS THER SEASON TO BE JOLLY : ALCOHOL SEEMS A JUMP[ START FOR SOME

UK researchers have found that whiskey consumed at the same amount as vodka gives a worse hangover but does not change performance the next day any more than vodka does. For some more details on this research, click here. I remember being told many years ago by researcher, Dr. Roger Weiss, that bourbon would kill fish in a tank while other liquors did not.

Given the Holiday season facing us, the media will be giving us a rundown of road fatalities by drunken drivers. They will not only kill or maim themselves but will take passengers and other drivers and passengers with them. If you have an inebriated guest, lift their keys and let them hunt until they are convinced they are lost and suggest that the guest sleep over. Don't worry about the privacy of a guest room, they will usually drop wherever they are and consider themselves lucky if there is a rug where they fall.

It has always escaped me how anyone can get drunk on Egg Nog no matter how heavily spiked. The stuff is pretty gag-worthy even when fat is eliminated and replaced with sea weed or horses hooves or whatever is used to thicken it these days. This short blog is not intended to succeed in convincing alcoholics to grab a designated driver but, rather, to let the normal sober person realize that Christmas is one of those holidays where 'new' drinks are concocted. The punch may have several different kinds of liquor in it and bite like shark. In attempts to make sure the supplies last, people go overboard with stocking up so that those inclined to not pass up a free drink have the bar set too high for their greed.

Remember, one way or another, their is a high price to be paid for over-indulgence.
Be prepared, beware, and be safe.

ARDIPTHECUS RAMADUS: MORE PROOF OF EVOLUTION

December is the time that people start adding and sorting things out of events of the year, decade, or whatever time lapse they choose. Victoria Gill, a science reporter for BBC News reports on Ardipithecus ramidus, a 4.4 million year old female, a million years older than Lucy. In view of all the scientific research and evidence of evolution, it is maddening that so many people are still so ignorant they believe evolution is only a theory.

Additionally, this first prize winner is described for being named as the most significant scientific achievement of the year (after 15 years of labor putting the fossil together and recreating what she might have looked like). This story was followed by the nine runners-up. For the complete story, click here. The nine runners up in Science's list of the year were Pulsar mystery, extended life, supreme conduction, plant survival, laser tool, gene therapy, magnetic monopoly, watery moon, and Hubble repair. These are all described in the BBC article.

REFRAMING A CONCEPT

One of the tools of psychotherapy is to reframe your patient's opinion, impression, or assumption. In a sense it is helping the patient think outside the box in which they have been trapped by their thinking. George Monbiot writes a column published in The Guardian. Here is a quote which I think is a lovely example of reframing. "Humanity is no longer split between conservatives and liberals, reactionaries and progressives, though both sides are informed by the older politics. Today the battlelines are drawn between expanders and restrainers; those who believe that there should be no impediments, and those who believe that we must live within limits." For the complete article, click here.The article is titled This Is About Us. It appeared on 12/14/09.

As with 'The One Whose Name We Dare Not Speak" from Harry Potter, many do not speak of or equate uninhibited Economic Growth with the desecration of our natural resources. We all laughed at Jack Benny who, confronted by a burglar with a gun said, "Your money or your life!", took a long time to answer and prodded by the burglar said, "I'm thinking, I'm thinking!" The realtors, manufacturers, developers, careless polluters and all others who threaten our planet are thinking how they can survive with riches, without caring about their descendants. Jack Benny may have been funny...they are not!

USING PROPER GRAMMAR

There is a wonderful blog...much of it geared to seniors, but not only to them, called TIME GOES BY. On Tuesday, Crabby Old Lady wrote a grammar rant. I saw no way to respond or add to her invitation for more examples. Annoying for those of us who pride ourselves in using correct grammar is that if more people (than not) use a word incorrectly, the keepers of the most-used dictionaries change the meaning to the incorrect usage. It is like the dumbing-down that our media tends to do do often. Media personalities seem never to be corrected for their misuse of grammar, not even accuracy of facts.

It used to be that if you said you were nauseous, it meant: 1 : causing nausea or disgust : nauseating. 2 : affected with nausea or disgust. Today Merriam Webster uses that meaning as 'causing' but also uses 'affected with', giving in to those who couldn't say I feel nauseated.

Chris Matthews uses 'ethnic' instead of 'race' which I find annoying even though I have written the correction to MSNBC. Clearly, no one in the media really cares for accuracy enough to correct the loudmouths who spout opinions, frequently wrong in facts as well as grammar.

Another frequently used pair of words are 'affect' and 'effect'.
A simple way to remember these is that affect is a verb; effect is a noun. (picture from Grammar Girl)

Marketers and ad people seem to have some of the worst grammar as do lyric writers who want to make words fit a rhyme. 'New Improved', while often an oxymoron, should be 'newly improved' if I remember what I was taught. To give the reader an even more accurate reading it might even be 'most recently improved' since some companies keep improving (or should that be 'recently changed')?

There are those who 'could care less' (hear the chalk scraping on the blackboard on that one) when it originally meant “it is impossible for me to have less interest or concern in this matter, since I am already utterly indifferent”.

When I say, "It is I" in response to "Who is there?", people look at me as though I'm a freak who doesn't know how to say "It's me!" That says nothing (on a side note) to the person who answers, on the phone, to 'with whom am I speaking?' with "It's me" in a voice you could swear you have never heard before. Not to be confused with an equally annoying habit of some who answer to "Where are you?" with "I'm here." This forces me to ask, "Where is here?"

When asked how I am, I love saying, "I'm good", realizing that people think I am saying I am well. Oh well, I'm well, and still drawing water from the well of life's enjoyment.

LIEBERMAN'S LIES EXPOSED ON MSNBC REPLAYED VIDEO FOOTAGE

Joseph Lieberman was not someone I liked or trusted even when he was Gore's VP running mate. Had I not been so aghast at the thought of voting for GW, I probably would have voted for any Republican who looked like presidential material. There has always been something about the way the man speaks...the nasal whine...that has added my distaste of his flip-flopping. Nevertheless, I voted for Gore with a lukewarm heart, wondering how many other people felt as I did.

Tonight on MSNBC, Rachel Maddow played enough footage of past positions expounded by Lieberman towards which he now holds a completely reversed position to demonstrate how the man cannot hold a position for himself but flows with the money. When he and Harkins once tried to pass a no-filibustering bill, he now takes pride that he, a single senator, can stop the HealthCare bill. He threatens to do just that plans to do it if they don't water the bill down to the point of making its intent almost meaningless. It doesn't matter that 60% of his constituents want the bill passed. One can only assume he does not plan to run again and doesn't mind committing political suicide. It does make one wonder where the pot of gold rests that would make a man do this to his own past reputation for caring for people.

Why our system doesn't make this Senatorial farce impossible is beyond me, a lay person? I surely hope those who are in a position to add it to the long list of things that need to be done to make our legislative body have real meaning and work for the people again, will be put on an agenda to be heard.

For an interesting article on the lack of veracity on Lieberman's part, click here.

IS THIS A CASE OF BETTER LATE THAN NEVER?

Criminals find that a name change doesn't always give them a new identity. One's past seems to cling like an incomplete wipe on hemorrhoids. Xe formerly known as Blackwater, money maker for those who finessed a no-bid contract through before the Obama administration came into being and have been raking it in for a long time. But all good things eventually come to pass and the CIA has taken over, using their own staff to load bombs onto their drones. The New York Times revealed the existence of the secret contract with Blackwater, renamed Xe, in August.

There are so many things that the American public never knew and still doesn't know about how the government makes sneaky decisions. At some point, politicians who add pork onto bills so that some frivolous expenditure can be added to their state parks rather than improving their schools and medical care of their people, will realize that they are robbing Peter to pay Paul, so to speak. Maybe even those voters who put them in office will smarten up and realize they, the taxpayers, are paying for it in the long run, whether they see it now or not. They are paying for the greedy politician to get re-elected to waste more of their money.

For the complete article from BBC on this, click here.

EROTICA VS PORN

Porn has been around forever and will likely remain that way. However, men whose first sexual experiences are through porn have to be totally retrained for female consumption. While watching porn before 'making love' (an oxymoron when used thus) with a real woman, they have some very funny ideas about both sexes. Sadly, they get very confused about what it is to be male. Ejaculating in your partner's face is not only demeaning but I have not any women outside of my mental health practice (or even in it, for that matter) who think the guy is macho or who can't turn him off fast enough.

Many older people use soft porn to save time in foreplay. Neither gender is sure that their endurance will last, especially males who are frequently on erection inhibiting medications. Physical causes may be: diabetes, hardening of the arteries, which can lead to high blood pressure, angina or poor circulation (blood pressure lowering medication can make an erection impossible for some), kidney disorders, multiple sclerosis or other neurological diseases, high cholesterol, side effects of prescribed drugs, heavy smoking, alcoholism and drug abuse, prostate problems, clinical depression, pelvic surgery. and more

Psychological problems such as stress, boredom, and low sexual self-esteem, among others may also be causes which may affect with one partner but not another. Adultery is often a first attempt to diagnose the problem before seeking other resources.

Since so little is publicly supportive of masturbation, specialty shops which sell products are seen as shameful by many and frowned on by religions who are still stuck on Onanism. For an excellent article on hardcore porn and its current effect on young people, click here.

WOMAN 98, SUFFOCATES 100 YEAR OLD ROOMMATE

An article on this tragedy reminds us, "It just really points to the issue of mental health with the elderly." The woman who was complaining that her roommate, Mrs Barrows, was having too many visitors, was known to be demented and paranoid, and the nursing home would not allow the family of the murdered woman to get a room change for their mother. The nursing home bares some of the responsibility for the death. Admittedly, hind site is better at predicting what might happen but there seem to have been many signals here which went unheeded. Nor was the 100 year old monitored protected from the constant verbal harassment from the roommate. Death by strangulation, at any age, is unacceptable.

Her defense lawyer, Carl Levin, said, Ms Lunquist, the 98 year old had a "long-standing diagnosis of dementia as well as issues of cognitive impairment". The staff must have been working off their own set of assumptions, ignoring the data before their faces. Why? Probably as this situation is without a clear precedent having been established. Paranoid, cognitively demented people lose judgment and would be totally unpredictable. The staff listened to this woman complaining. apparently, but the erroneous assumption that an old woman wouldn't do anything as violent as that makes one wonder at what kind of other outrageous, though perhaps non-violent, is tolerated by staff. In many nursing homes staff is not well-paid and many foreign speaking staff who have grown up with entirely different standards of care and little education are the caretakers.

The attacker is being evaluated for competency to stand trial. Both families are left to mourn. For the BBC article, click here.

READ THE FEET

Man, on his long quest to find the ONE-SIZE-FITS-ALL unique "Aha!" has felt bumps on the head, read eye movements, lines in the palm of hands, astrological readings, tarot cards, brain waves, and all sorts of things of which I am yet unaware. However, we must not underestimate mankind's innovations and observation abilities.

New research is reputed to show sexual response and lying by observing feet. (Apparently this works more with women than men). For more detail, click here and listen to the researcher explain that which I find inexplicable.

NO OTHER OPTION

Australia has to cull out camels who are threatening human water supplies because in their thirst they are turning over water hydrants and using up all the water, shutting it off to homes. Like the Republicans on HealthCare, animal protection groups such as PETA are making loud noises but offer no better suggestions. Click here for the whole article.

Frequently, in Massachusetts, deer die of starvation since they have few predators and little food near the northeast coast during particularly severe winters. People who care about the cruelty of allowing these animals to starve also cull them out at such times. I have never understood why alleged animal rights people fight that but have not come up with a better solution. They do not come up with either an alternative or the cash to feed the hungry animals,
(or humans either).

When a pregnant woman chooses abortion rather than inadequate medical care or malnutrition for her unborn child we have those intractable thinkers who say 'no to abortion' but offer no alternative. Some think carrying a child for nine months, by an unhealthy, depressed mother is not damaging to a fetus, nor is it damaging to a child to bring them, unwanted, into the world. Adoption is not a guarantee of a better life for a child. We have all seen too many adoption failures by the adoptive parents as well as damaged children, adopted, who destroy families.

For centuries we have often believed there was no other option when someone who thinks out of the box comes out with one. However, until that happens, people must use logic around the whole system of a problem such as, freeing laboratory mice who are not equipped to forage for food for themselves is sentencing them to a cruel death or of being some other animal's dinner, or of starvation.

When will people learn that an immediate solution may not actually solve a problem but create worse problems? If we hadn't learned that before, shouldn't we have learned it by now after 6 years in Iraq at such a cost to our military personnel and their families?

RANDOM RESPONSES TO THE DAY'S NEWS

It shocks me when I hear people say, "I didn't vote because I knew XXX was going to get in." I'm working hard at gaining mastery in guilt tripping them though I obviously have not aced the art yet. It reminds me of friends who voted for someone they didn't want to see in because they wanted to make a statement to their candidate of choice. The statement ended up being the loss of the candidate they thought was such a shoo in.

Hypocrisy is only outdone by stupidity and ignorance. Uganda is making laws to kill homosexuals on the basis of a grown-up cottage industry that has sprung up to sell courses, retreats, books or 'whatevers' to teach people how to cure themselves and others of homosexuality. A naive or sick government is buying it. What sickens me is that it is Americans who are behind it all. To read an article on Where scandal meets spirituality, click here. It boggles my mind that there are enough sick and misguided people to keep these politicians, con artists and non-scientists on the job.

Lastly, where is the rumor coming from that predicts the Republicans will win all the next elections? Does anyone really think that returning to the good old days of GW Bush will be a good campaign slogan? If the majority of the country voted Obama in on the hope of CHANGE, what makes anyone think that spells Republican in any language or delusion?

POST PUBESCENT EMERITUS

I've never liked the terms 'senior citizen' or 'golden ager' because it puts me in a category with people for whom I often feel little affinity. Senior implies I have risen from junior but also, in today's world of political correctness, I prefer being known as a 'post pubescent emeritus'. Emeritus from Merriam Webster: Main Entry: 1 emer·i·tus Pronunciation: \i-ˈmer-ə-təs\ Function: noun Inflected Form(s): plural emer·i·ti \-ə-ˌtī, -ˌtē\ Date: 1750 : one retired from professional life but permitted to retain as an honorary title the rank of the last office held. From Wikipedia: The word originated in the mid-18th century from Latin as the past participle of emereri meaning to "earn one's discharge by service". Emereri itself is a compound of the prefix e- (a variant of ex-) meaning "out of or from" and merēre meaning "earn".

There is no question that before I hit the peak of my life and started on the downward curve, I was living life fully holding onto happiness when and wherever I found it. As with professors, writers, etc who lay claim to the title, senior citizen suggests that I am no longer young, yet I retain qualities of it and am still able to survive and enjoy where I am in life. Though retired from extreme physical exertion and chasing after the opposite sex, I don't feel as though I jumped into a totally new stage of life in a parallel universe but, rather, remain in a slowed-down extension my whole life.

GOLDEN AGE: WHEN THE ANGST OF FUTURE IS BEHIND YOU.

When you are born, your entire future is ahead of you. However, though you may lay a foundation for your future through childhood and adolescence, it is only when you are career planning, job hunting after 'finding yourself' and hunting a life partner, that the pressure of choice determines much of your future.

One of the nice things of old age is that those are not usually choices any longer so one might say your future is behind you at least in a planning sense. The future in old age is 'getting really old' or 'death'. For those who think there is life (as we know) it after death, I suppose it may be felt as their future...but I do not consider it mine. At that point, I see my future as oblivion and if I live to a ripe old age with my brain functioning like a slow CPU and all my senses at least limping along, I will consider that a great future from where I am today. That future that is now behind me turned out pretty well. I'm happy to face 'going forward' and reliving the future behind me in memories.

WHY IS THE US IGNORING THE SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE?

In 1957 I was in the Chicago area and had no choice but to go to a Catholic Hospital. I asked the doctor if there only one of us could be saved, my unborn child or I, who would live. He said, even though it was a Catholic Hospital they had to respect the choice of the patient. He assured me I would live to raise my other, 4 year old, child. Fortunately that was not put to a test.

Ann Neumann, AlterNet. Posted November 3, 2009. It is now 52 years later and Roe versus Wade has been the law of the land for many years. The majority of USA citizens believe it should be respected. We do not all believe in the same religions nor scientific findings but our forefathers tried to make a country where everyone could be safe to believe whatever felt true to them. Why then are we fostering a view that it is okay to kill doctors who are trying to observe the law that allows women, who desperately want them, to obtain abortions?

Neumann's article asks the question: Does the Vatican Have a Say in Your Health Decisions? "In the first months of her pregnancy, Candace Rich informed her doctors that she wanted to have her tubes tied. Tubal ligation is cheaper and easier on the patient's health when done during a Cesarean section, so Rich asked her doctors to perform the procedure if she required one. Two days after her due date, Rich was told that she would need a Cesarean but that the hospital refused to perform the simple operation because St. Luke, formerly a secular facility, now operated under Catholic doctrine.

"The doctor told me that 'because of the Vatican,' St. Luke could no longer do that procedure," said Rich in an affidavit. She was forced to find another hospital in the last few days before her surgery and to pay for the full cost of the operation."

For her complete article, click here .

What is wrong with our political system that it ignores our laws and basic tenets of our Constitution? Are people really afraid if they don't go along with what religious 'leaders' preach that they will really not go to 'Heaven'? What makes it so difficult to see hypocrisy when it is so blatant?

BEING USED BY OTHERS

Recently I was asked how you can prevent yourself from being used by friends and others. After much thought, I realized you can't always prevent this from happening, but once you see that it is, you can easily stop it.

You can't know someone will manipulate and use you until it is happening, or if you knew someone's reputation for this before, you should be well warned and defensively cautious and the responsibility then totally yours. It is you who decides just how much you wish to do for another; it has nothing to do with how much they wheedle, plead, or manipulate. Whether you say yes or agree is always up to you unless there is some sort of blackmail going on which puts you into a bind to keep you or someone else from getting hurt. Even then, you need to decide whether or not to go along with the request.

There are three ways of being used...one is as in 'usury' (an unconscionable or exorbitant rate or amount of interest). Credit cards and loan sharks do this but, again, most of us have a choice whether we wish to participate. If there are no other options open, you may be forced to be used. The second is as in 'abused' (to put to a wrong or improper use, to maltreat). This is a power struggle in which one may be the weaker and the loser. Employers, parents, sexual predators, teachers, or anyone in higher authority may be the abuser...physically, emotionally, financially or otherwise. There are ways to stop the abuse but usually one has to understand they are being abused, which surprisingly the victim does not always realize. The third is as in 'misused' (to use incorrectly, misapply or mistreat). If you allow yourself to be in a situation where the rules and boundaries are not clear, you lay yourself open to result in being mistreated. You are responsible for giving a doctor correct information or you cannot claim mistreatment, as an example.

The bottom line in any abuse (other than with children who might not be able to know better or have no control over a situation, or special needs children who may be physically or mentally challenged and who do not have coping skills). It is incumbent on us all to be our own advocates, to ask for help when we need it, and to not believe, mistakenly, that we will be loved if we do everything others ask of us.
Setting your own boundaries doesn't make manipulators happy but it will spare you.

A normal give in take in healthy relationships is not misuse. We all use others but there should always be a give and take and agreements must be consensual.

A REASON WHY WOMEN MAY LIVE LONGER THAN MEN

For years scientists and researchers have claimed that women live longer because their life is easier and they are less stressed than men...or similar rationalizations. Now researchers believe that men, through genes passed only by sperm, therefore from the father's side, have a built in gene signal that shortens their life as compared to women.

"Scientists working on mice have highlighted a specific gene that, although carried by both sexes, appears to be active only in males. They believe it allows males to grow bigger bodies - but at the expense of their longevity." For the complete article, click here. Obviously, as with most research, longevity is determined by many variables. People die from illnesses, accidents, life style poor choices, toxin ingestion, violence, suicide, homicide, and many factors which have nothing to do with genes. However, it would be interesting to continue to follow this research.
A period life table is what insurance companies are interested in. After all, they bet against the odds, don't they?...But they try to limit that to setting up their premiums to allow them to figure their odds most closely to be in their favor ultimately.

FACEBOOK IS INSTITUTING A NEW PRIVACY CONTROL

The Washington Post unveiled Google's plans to change the way Facebook has currently been handling what is now their 350,000,000 users. "Facebook is also going to remove regional networks entirely, largely because some of those networks (like China) consist of millions of users, which makes them useless from a privacy standpoint." For the entirety of this article, click here.

From Wikipedia: "Facebook is a global social networking website that is operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc.[1] Users can add friends and send them messages, and update their personal profiles to notify friends about themselves. Additionally, users can join networks organized by city, workplace, school, and region. The website's name stems from the colloquial name of books given at the start of the academic year by university administrations with the intention of helping students get to know each other better.

Mark Zuckerberg founded Facebook with his college roommates and fellow computer science students Eduardo Saverin, Dustin Moskovitz and Chris Hughes while he was a student at Harvard University.[5] The website's membership was initially limited to Harvard students, but was expanded to other colleges in the Boston area, the Ivy League, and Stanford University. It later expanded further to include any university student, then high school students, and, finally, to anyone aged 13 and over. The website currently has more than 350 million active users worldwide.[6]

Facebook has met with some controversy. It has been blocked intermittently in several countries including Syria,[7] China[8], Vietnam[9], and Iran.[10] It has also been banned at many places of work to discourage employees from wasting time using the service.[11] Privacy has also been an issue, and it has been compromised several times. Facebook settled a lawsuit regarding claims over source code and intellectual property.[12]

A January 2009 Compete.com study ranked Facebook as the most used social network by worldwide monthly active users, followed by MySpace.[13]"

For those of us with a little less energy to add yet another platform of communication, I (for one) await the new information on how to handle the new and improved Facebook which will reach us momentarily.

DO WE EVEN KNOW WHAT IT IS WE ARE FIGHTING, OR FOR WHAT END?

After the President's speech tonight, Keith Olbermann talked to someone who was in Germany who spoke about a key issue not being addressed being the Pashtuns. I've heard the word before, was not sure of the spelling, and was surprised to learn they are the majority of people in Afghanistan. My next question was, "Is Karzai a Pastun?" Yes he is. "Hamid Karzai, an ethnic Pashtun of the Popalzai tribe, was born in the village of Karz,[1] which is located on the edge of Kandahar City in southern Afghanistan." Read the whole biography here. Like many American politicians, Karzai seems to have forgotten just whom he represents. While his reportedly crooked family is being protected, I find it hard to believe it is because they are Pashtuns and Afghani citizens rather than all the money involved for all the family...but I guess I am just a cynic.

We are, as a country, fighting the damage that is without explanation estimation. The Bush Doctrine is one of the worst possible atrocities not only let loose on the world but thought by some to be reflective of the character of the United States. It should be unacceptable anywhere that is governed with humanity and logic...which we apparently missed in the US for eight years.

The Bush Doctrine brought us to Iraq (which did not have weapons of mass destruction hanging around ready to be brought to us, nor did it have any connection to 911 or al Qaeda) and has us mired in debt, the censure of the world at large, and is finally being changed by ourt newer President whose major energies are being taken up by tryng to clean up the mess made by the last Administration (blaming GW Bush when we all know he only began to try to administrate towards the end of his presidency, having spent the most of his term vacationing, blustering and bragging while Cheney, Rumsfeld, et al were busy bringing the country to an almost terminal illness.

Obama is left trying to put out a fire, started with a huge match and left to burn for eight years or more, with a garden hose. Oh well, we might get lucky and only lose a few more thousand of our military forces but we will try to pretend we have won something which has no gold ring to grab to get there.

IT'S DEJA VU ALL OVER AGAIN

President Obama has pledged 30,000 more troops for Afghanistan. For the past eight years we have heard more and more troops being deployed, more deaths, more traumatic brain injuries, more limbs blown off, blindness, and all sorts of horrible conditions that would not have survived in previous wars.

We hear the lies of the fear-mongers and 'Chicken Littles', which so many foolish people believe. It amazes me how little people are truly informed and how many think they are informed because their lying sources tell them 'we are the truth'. Old people confuse threats that 'they' are out to get rid of old people. There are too many with companies cutting, rather than raising, COLAs for their pensioners. Ah, that ubiquitous 'they', not easily answered when questioned closely to be defined.

Sometimes I wish I truly believed in a Heaven and Hell in the afterlife...I could dream that, at last, I would be somewhere among the 'good' people. However, those whom I see as 'good' are seen as 'bad' by others. Did Solomon train St. Peter for the job> It will truly take a remarkable committee by God to make all those judgments, will it not? Heaven must have to have an organizational manager 24/7 as people pour in through the Gates. Did God only decide to have a Heaven after Christianity began? Would he have considered the first humans, native Heavenites? Are they the only ones allowed to build gambling casinos? Would the Neanderthals have been considered human enough? Do modern inventions make it to Heaven or do dead inventors have to work to build them there? Does Heaven have entertainment centers, TV, clubs, parties? What is the entertainment there? If you have been good in your life on earth, but uneducated, do they have schools in Heaven? Do people have to eat in Heaven? If so, who does the cooking and cleaning there? Is there sex in Heaven for those who didn't have enough on Earth? Is Heaven for earthlings only or will there be beings from other planets there. If there is a God, is he for all planet life or only Earth?

Such are the many questions I ask to which I get no answers. Even though Ministers claim to speak with God, they can't ask him these sorts of questions, apparently, since the Bible is God's word and he didn't start speaking much to man until after his son was killed and resurrected. After all the begats and story about two people starting the human line, there don't seem to have been historians prior to that except those who drew on cave walls and that hardly gives word to my questioning. It seems those cave drawings were more memos like, "Dear, I took the horse and went for a ride." Or it might have been a diary entry, "On my way back to the cave I was ambushed and killed a few neighbors."

If you get to see all your loved ones in Heaven, then Heaven must be a deja vu experience right? Do residents find old friends on something like a Heavenly Facebook. Do they have Heavenly computers? Are the doomed souls part of the space debris....gosh, I really have to stop this. I can't even find the answers on Google...most frustrating!

THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY

Most of the people (many unfortunately on the media where this should not happen) speculate out loud as though they are speaking facts...at least, that is how they are often heard. I am a great fan of Tiger Woods, the golfer; I have no interest in looking through keyholes or intruding into his personal life.

It isn't that I am without understanding as to why people like to read People Magazine or live vicariously though their latched onto idols. What escapes me is that they have been taught by the moneymaking media that they have a right to know all the intimate details of anyone who appears before the public in movies, politics, sports or otherwise. Why should they have any more right to know about someone's personal life just because their profession is public. This is a hype made possible by the profiters of the intrusive tactics of the Paparazzi and others who feed to gossip magazines. Yet if you told the readers of such that they are just nosy gossips who would be angry if they were exposed in the same fashion, they would probably rationalize that it would be different. But it really isn't. Movie stars have learned (or been told ) to accept the intrusions as a part of their job...but should it be?

Unless I am mistaken, 'the right to know' was intended to speak to politics and government and is intended to allow people to be informed about things that directly touch their lives. Why Tiger Woods had an accident in his car does not directly effect my life. Nor do the messy divorces, interaction with law enforcement, unless they are political figures or in some way would be performing a direct service to me such as surgery, etc.) effect my life in any way.

At this point, any suggestions in cleaning up society would cost some people jobs. Should that stop us from trying to make our society a better place in which to live? a safer place, a more private place where it is appropriate? For someone else's view on the subject, click here.

THE WINSOR MUSIC CHAMBER SERIES

Tonight a friend talked me into into gnawing off the virtual restraints on my wrists and crawling out of my cage to go to a concert. It was a Winsor Music Series Chamber Series concert and an auditory delight. Having gone to Boston Symphony for the past five years to hear music in a concert hall, for the most part, it was wonderful to realize that Chamber Music can be so ear caressing. Peggy Pearson is the Artistic Director and oboist, Olympic quality.

This program was advertised as a Young Artists Program and renewed my awe in young musicians. Sonata in F major for Cello and Piano, Op. 99 was played pianist Eliko Akahori with Rafael Popper-Keizer on cello. The next offering was a John Harbison Chorale Cantata (talk by the composer) and preceded by a Bach Chorale he had rewritten.

However, the last number, Concerto for Oboe, Violin and Strings in C minor, bwv 1060 by Bach was followed with a standing ovation and several curtain calls. The oboist was Peggy Pearson who played flawlessly as one might have expected with her experience and proficiency. However, the greatest surprise was to see a tiny, 12 year old Japanese girl. Yuki Beppu, who played violin extraordinarily beautifully. She had a child's anxious look towards someone in the back of the hall and the most beatific smile when she must have understood how well she was being received. This made being there worth it all on a chilly night! None of those body language signals come through on CDs.... Lest one think this was her debut...not so! She has played with Yo-Yo Ma (2007) and Governor Deval Patrick's Inauguration, as well as having won many competitions and awards.

For more of Yuki's story, http://www.abcsofstrings.com/beppu.html.

IT'S DUBAI'S TURN

Most of us have seen the pictures of excesses in Dubai sent around the world in email that have caused us to gasp...the sterling silver Mercedes, the ski slope indoors on the desert, the luxury townhouses or whatever on man-made islands with breathtaking views of the land and water, etc. However, the financial woes anywhere in the world seem to come back to haunt us as ours have been haunting the rest of the world for a while. Our stock market dropped markedly when Dubai made its current financial problems known.

For pictures of Dubai, click here. Ah, even the mighty falter! It is so easy to think the good times will remain forever, isn't it?

GARLIC AND SOME OF ITS MANY USES

If you can wait through the Chrome Google Ad, watch this video on garlic in China today. Those of us who are well acquainted with good old USA Gilroy garlic, will have to watch what is done about it or to it. Hopefully Gilroy will remain a staple in most American homes as well as my own.

Written by Ray Sahellian, MD on garlic's use and effectiveness: "Garlic is a member of the same group of plants as the onion. The bulb is the part used for consuming or as medicine. Epidemiological as well as laboratory studies have shown that garlic and onion consumption reduces certain cancer incidences in the stomach, colon, mammary, cervical, and other sites. The use of garlic for medicinal purposes dates to antiquity. Garlic bulbs were found in tombs of the pharaohs, in Crete, and in ancient cultures throughout the world. Hippocrates considered garlic to be a vital part of his therapeutic armamentarium
In an analysis of eight studies from Italy and Switzerland, researchers found that older adults with the highest onion and garlic intakes had the lowest risks of a number of cancers -- including colon, ovarian and throat cancers. Garlic is also helpful in dilating blood vessels, has cardiovascular benefits, and may have anti germ potential."

Each year, Gilroy, CA, has a huge harvest festival. Check out some of the recipes. Raised on a Mediterranean diet, I can attest to the wonderful power of garlic lowering blood pressure and cooling off a person in heated temperatures. However, it does not simply require garlic flavoring, but usually a requirement to ingest pretty much of the whole head of garlic. I found its power when I ate a generous helping, several times, of Skordalia and couldn't figure out why my teeth were chattering when the temperature was in the 90's. There are more recipes for this sauce than words for snow in the Arctic, click here for an excellent example.

Years ago, my husband and I had two male friends who were both chocolate and garlic lovers and so I quite facetiously said, "Next time I have you over to dinner I will make chocolate covered garlic for you." Glancing through an Italian cookbook I found that it was already considered a delicacy in Italy. The shocker was that they covered the raw garlic with chocolate; so I tried it. I felt like someone had taken claws all the way down my esophagus to depths in my body that have never burned like that before (or ever again, I might add)! Undaunted, however, I put the peeled head of garlic cloves in the microwave just briefly enough to cook the knife edge out of them, leaving that Heavenly bouquet which was then dipped in chocolate and allowed to harden. When it was served at a dinner, it was as though someone had vacuumed it all up in an instant.

Will the Chinese take yet another treat away from me by raising prices high enough for me to want to fore go its use? As soon as something good comes along, someone else starts manipulating the prices excessively. That's shoots the theory about garlic protecting us. It seems we must protect the garlic!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

It is possible only to give thanks for the turkeys of the feathered kind in our lives...not the rest who glut the airwaves and media, those teabaggers and birthers, the ones who decided what God has intended by a guess that is as accurate (perhaps) as that made by the rest of us who make no guess about what God intended but, rather, live morally, with integrity, and by the Golden Rule.

We seniors can give thanks to waking up every day. We are able to guess the weather by the amount of creak in our joints, and are, thankfully, able to recognize who and where we are. If the pains are less than the pleasures in our lives, we count ourselves very fortunate to be alive, have good health 'for our age', and enjoy friendship with people who return the pleasure of our being together.

I particularly give thanks to the many who promised to keep me in laughter when my husband was dying...now nine years ago. They have done a wonderful job at making sure I get my laughs daily. Not only do they share laughter with me but I am then able to share it with others. Some people call this a positive outlook on life...I think it is far more enjoyable to love and laugh than to frown, criticize, and be miserable.

My thankfulness extends to others who, being aware that having made large family parties on Holidays for much of my life, feel it is now someone else's turn.

If you wish to thank a God, do so, but I do think our hard work, being caring of others, and hurting no one has to account for some of that for which we can be thankful.

DEFINING A POLITICAL PARTY

It seems that most people who claim to be in one party or another can't easily define what makes them in that party by goals or beliefs. It is rather amusing. More often I hear somebody say they are a Democrat because they hate Republicans, or vice versa. Even more ridiculous was the woman interviewed by the media who had bought two of Sara Palin's books to have autographed and was one of the hundred left without signatures when Palin just walked away, unannounced, and disappeared back in her bus while the hundred or so chanted and booed outside the bus. This particular lady who had waited in line for hours in the cold, complained about the $40 she had paid for the two books she was to have had Palin sign, but would now be returning them and would certainly NOT vote for Palin.

How sad that voting for an importance office as the leader of the Free World, rests with such empty reasoning. I would like to believe that an anomaly but know all too clearly from personal conversations that the choice is just as irrelevant and simplistic, all too often. Click here to read the entire resolution. With these criteria, not even Ronald Reagan would be considered a true Democrat. It rather makes the term 'true Democrat' somewhat an oxymoron.

Since the voting box is private, I've always wondered how many people say they are voting for someone just to avoid household arguments. Knowing a few vociferous, dogmatic, and insulting people, if you dare to support someone they do not approve it can become a most unpleasant interaction. Thus it is easy to agree with the loudmouth, making an argument impossible.

It makes a farce out of our system wherein all politicians should put country before party, constitution and laws before religious practice, and not just put all energy into getting re-elected. The system has certainly become as corrupted as software after a virus attack. It would be nice to think that there is action being taken in the Administration to move us away from the disloyal, divisive, falsehood perpetrators of the last group in office.

POSITIVE THINKING

It hadn't occurred to me that what may be positive thinking in one person's view is not to another. When I had a patient dying of cancer, she was told to read mind over body stuff and told me that she had felt punished by having to read it. She had tried to live a clean and stress-free life but facts and people around her never let that happen. One might ask what her genetics also had to do with her illness. At any rate, she felt that it was expected of her to cure her own cancer with mind over body and she was failing to be able to do it.

When Obama ran on a platform of Hope and Change I could easily relate to both concepts. However, the more I thought of it, I realized that too many people believe prayer is hope, about which they do nothing to advance themselves or their fellow man. Hard work and determination must accompany hope if change is to be the result. Those who pray that a higher power will do it for them, or may even think the President they voted for will do it for them instantly, are living an illusion. Only fools believe an accurate diagnosis means a total cure with no assist from the patient.

Positive thinking and hope make your body feel better. Less cortisol accumulates and your brain deteriorates more slowly as the years go by, giving reason to not leaving clinical depressions untreated. Just as 'you can't cure stupid', positive thinking alone cures little. It allows you to see happiness where others miss it, beauty when others see only blemishes, humor in even a hopeless situation. Positive thinking allows you to take control of your own life rather than waiting for someone else to do it for you. Positive thinking, however, must have facts and reality as a base, otherwise we must call it delusional thinking, which I believe is as contagious and lethal as the swine flu, or H1N1 as we lovingly refer to it.

Rise, Americans, not to do battle but to support the man you appointed to do a job for you. Give him time and ideas, not edicts. It is, after all, his job, not yours, to run the country.

COVETING MATERIAL STUFF; EXCESSES; LIFE INVENTORY

The title is somewhat misleading since it started in the Great Depression when wants and deprivation were the only excesses. For every action, there is a reaction...so say laws of physics. When someone is deprived, reaction is likely to be that there will be an attempt to live life so that a repeat of that wanting or sense of no control will not reoccur.

Many of those of us, Great Depression survivors, became pack rats. I hold onto things because 'I might need them later, if not at this moment' and because I could never replace them (clearly because they are so obsolete!). In today's world of built in obsolescence, it may be fear that you will never find the source for 'it' or' them' again or that too many companies will stop making that favorite product; 'it' dies and no one is making replacements or it costs more to fix it than 'it' is worth or you lack money with which to pay. While some replacements are an improvement, many are not and we must live with the memory of having had something to cherish (like a lover before losing that lover forever). A superfluity may gradually result. As George Carlin may have described it, I'm drowning in stuff.

People, you learn, come and go in your life. Some you will miss and some you will quickly forget, pushing into that part of your memory where they are brought forward only when someone else reminds you of them for a brief spot of time, then quickly recede into that vague storage place in your brain again.

Trying to hold onto things, I have taken pictures, bought 78s, then LPs, then CDs, and loads of sheet music. I bought a VCR and filled hundreds of tapes. I put some 78s onto reel to reel tape, copied a few favorites onto audio cassettes, and a few of those onto CDs. Pictures were printed, some slides, many of them digitized and it would have gone on to my becoming brain dead if I had not had an epiphany. I recalled my husband telling me that one could not capture and hold everything (That is not when I gave up trying to, though). The great picture that was missed must be a head picture, as he called it. The epiphany made me realize that I don't have to hold onto everything from my past. There will be new friends, foods, products, music, books and enough of anything else that is important to me.

Taking a life inventory shows me that I now have enough unwatched DVDs, unlistened to CDs, unread books, and food stored in the house that, if I bought nothing for the rest of my life, neither my body nor mind would starve. A new freedom from wanting has settled to a feeling of ease within...at last, I have enough...for now. Now my problem is how to get rid of enough of it to make my living space less of a blivet. (If you've read my blog before, you know that a blivet is stuffing three pounds of excrement in a two pound bag.)

AMERICAN DISCONTENT AGE

There has never been a time in our history when everyone is satisfied, and there, doubtfully, will ever be. However it is not just that some are discontent...it is 'how many', 'to what degree', 'over what', and 'what is being planned to be done about it' and 'by whom'.

In an attempt to make us a one-size-fits-all society, instead of accepting differences, there is an attempt to eliminate differences by enacting laws. One group does not believe in evolution and wants to do away with it being taught as a scientific concept. That would turn the clock back on scientific research on viruses and lots of other important research. Another group back to back alley abortions or unwanted children born while anything older than a fetus is not considered as a life to be respected.

Religious groups are fighting to get their ideas made into law and are, sadly, getting away with it because legislators are listening more to their clergy than their constituents. The gap between the top 1 percent and the remaining 99 percent of the U.S. population has grown to a record high. (see David DeGraw, Amped Status. Posted November 21, 2009.)

While there is a great pretense that race is not a presidential issue, a man who is half Caucasian, half African black is always referred to as our black president. Racists still abound and he is usually spoken of with reference to his racial origins as our 'black president'. The love/hate schism, set in many when GW Bush was elected, has festered and is now switched 180 degrees, spinning out of control. The Michelle Bachmanns, Sarah Palins and all the other hate mongers like Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh and too many to be separately listed seems to be steadily growing, if one is to judge from the radio air time and TV media time given to them. We laugh at the black humor of this being considered 'fair and balanced' news.

Suicide and crime have both risen as they are bound to do when people can no longer support themselves and their families. The saying: 'Desperate times require desperate measures.'is being mentioned more often. What was the administration thinking reappointing Tim Geithner and the other Bush economic carry-overs, (give-it-to-ones-who caused-the problem-in-the-first-place guys), and (lets-keep-our-guys-in-the-money thinkers).

The media's haste to make entertainment and get Nielsen ratings upped makes information being given to average citizens a distorted view of what is going on in the country. Most people are too lazy and disinterested to spend their time trying to ferret out what is really going on and seem surprised to hear anything that wasn't covered as headlines in the NY Times or told something someone else heard but they missed.

We can talk about the concrete, very real problems about the economy, Health Care and the need for all people to be covered, unemployment, etc. but I see little written about the depressed ambiance of the country in general. What we need are a few good social scientists asking the questions that the paid pollsters don't get asked to ask.

CHOICES

"Scientists have shown off an effect not unlike that of the "phasers" in the show Star Trek - but it only works on tiny worms called nematodes.

They used a special molecule that, when exposed to ultraviolet (UV) light, changes its shape. When the worms were fed this molecule and then exposed to UV light, they exhibited paralysis. But when the worms were again exposed to visible light, they regained their ability to move. "

The work is published in Journal of the American Chemical Society. To read the entire BBC article, click here.

It brings up the subject of research (not related to the above article) and how permission is granted. Like the imperative for witches, first 'No harm shall be done'. That, of course, is not easily determined. When a researcher has not followed protocol and all the rules, the research is suspended, or worse, terminated. However, despite the researcher's poor following of rules, if no harm came to any of the subjects, should the researcher be 'punished' by not allowing final data to be worked on even if it means publishing and reputation building for the researcher. This assumes that the actual research itself followed its protocol and problems were within the researcher only. The desire to punish bad behavior and stop all the researcher's work is very strong but we must keep in mind that the purpose of research is to make useful, scientific findings. If a researcher personally benefits as well, that is a nice peripheral gain for the researcher.

The choices in life are many. Taking and making choices has more or less risk as determined by the odds. For example, lotteries carry greater odds and generally yield more financial gain. Most choices don't involve instant gains, as with lotteries. Those unable to do research and follow trends are apt to miss out on when to make that choice. As refrigerators became popular, the ice man who quickly changed careers might have made a good choice.

Unfortunately, it is in human nature for many to wait until there is no alternative, forced to make a choice. Equally unfortunate is that, by that time, the choices are far more limited because those better at seeing the future trends had already made choices. If you have trouble making up your mind, lots of choices shut down and are no longer available to you. If you choose too quickly, without weighing all the pros and cons, you are equally in trouble. It boils down to life is not easy...choose carefully and well every time a choice is open to you and maximize your finances, professional and emotional life, or anything else that can have meaning for you!

We have choices about whether to take care of our bodies and perhaps live longer; choices about who we have as friends, choices about careers to pursue, and constant choices far too numerous to try to mention.

THE IMPORTANCE OF EXPLAINING

Today I listened to radio on which a father, who was a professor of something or other, was saying how he always explained any decision he handed down to his young children. It surprised me because I raised my own children with that philosophy...they may not agree but they would hear why I made my decision. Often it was, "You haven't shown me you can handle that responsibility." I tried to then let them know what behaviors and actions would be necessary to show me they were ready. It seemed to have worked because my children grew up to be responsible adults.

Have you ever noticed in most of the romance novels, most of the problems occur because someone doesn't explain why they did or said whatever and horrendous misunderstandings ensued. Of course, there is also a situation in which some people explain inaccurately, manipulate the explanation to suit their own needs (like the Republicans seem to be doing a great deal these days.) I wonder what these people do with their children. My fear is that discipline must be like it is in old Greek families who believed that children should be seen and not heard until they were 18, at which point they should automatically turn into wise and knowledgeable adults...even though it never works that way.

Another reason some parents don't explain things to their children is that they do not know that the reason they are saying , "No, you can't borrow the car tonight (even though you have your license and have no behavior to be ashamed or uncomfortably about in the past) because my worrying would be too uncomfortable for me to bear until you come home.

The GW Bush Administration treated us like small children because we were rarely shown reality or given explanations about what the government was doing. The few times an attempt was made to inform the public about what was going on it sounded like an aged nun trying to explain the sexual facts of life to an adolescent girl with raging hormones.

Remember, if you have difficulty explaining what you meant by what you just said, you probably shouldn't have said it. Explaining your decisions is a wonderful exercise in separating your subjective views form you objectivity. An example of that sort of failure is the son who moved his aged mother out of her beloved apartment and neighborhood in New York City to his posh house in a wealthy Connecticut community where he felt she was ungrateful because she complained she was lonely and had no friends. He, on the other hand, never listened to what she was lonely about and grieving having had to give up, and thought she should have been grateful for his care. Not once had he heard her needs or asked her what she wanted. She was the last example, that of someone who tried to explain but to someone who wasn't going to hear her explanation...those are the worst kind!

Every once in a while someone writes a really interesting column. Joshua Holland hits more winners than many I have read.

Priceless: Gay Rights Activists Take Over Christian Right Hate-Fest in DC
Posted by Joshua Holland, AlterNet at 12:00 PM on November 17, 2009. "A techie hired by a group of radical clerics who went to the capitol to denounce homosexuals decided not to risk the bad karma.

I guess Dana Milbank just worships power and delights in picking on the marginalized. So while I've grown to detest him for years of snarky columns cherry-picking little vignettes to make progressives -- environmentalists, anti-war activists, human rights experts -- look like hopeless geeks who should be ignored when the GOP was in power, now that the Democrats are riding high he seems to be focusing that admittedly sharp pen on tea-baggers and the religious right -- the GOP's immoderate base.

Today he tells an interesting story that could have been titled: Reverend Smith Goes to Washington ...

Conservative Christian ministers from across the land, determined to test the bounds of a new law punishing anti-gay hate crimes, assembled outside the Justice Department on Monday to denounce the sin of homosexuality and see whether they would be charged with lawbreaking.

Needless to say, no arrests were made.

No hands were cuffed. In fact, the few cops in attendance were paying no attention to the speakers, instead talking among themselves and checking their BlackBerrys.

The evangelical activists had been hoping to provoke arrest, because, as organizer Gary Cass of the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission put it, "we'd have standing to challenge the law." But their prayers were not answered. Nobody was arrested, which wasn't surprising: To run afoul of the new law, you need to "plan or prepare for an act of physical violence" or "incite an imminent act of physical violence."

But there was some drama ...

Instead of getting arrested, the ministers got something else: A couple of dozen gay activists, surrounding them with rainbow flags and signs announcing "Gaga for Gay Rights" and "I Am a Love Warrior." By the end, the gay rights activists had taken over the lectern and the sound system and were holding their own news conference denouncing the ministers.

That's rich, but it gets better ...

Cass turned angrily to the AV guy. "We're not on the clock, are we?" He turned with equal anger to Valk. "You guys gonna help us pay for the microphones?"

The gay activist smiled. "God," he said, "works in mysterious ways."

In this case, God took the form of Chuck Fazio, from DC Podiums. Fazio was hired by the religious conservatives to provide the sound system for the event, but upon learning of their cause, he decided to donate his proceeds to the gay rights activists and to give them a chance at the microphone before shutting down the amplifiers. "I don't want bad karma," he explained, noting with some pride that the lectern they were using was the same one used by Borat on a recent Washington visit.

Sometimes, I really do love America."

So do I when people who claim to be fair, act fair; those who claim to be moral, act moral; those who claim to be honest, really are.